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The First 9 Things To Do After Getting Engaged

First of all—Congratulations!

This is such an excit­ing time for you and your new fiancé. There’s a sense of wonderment—they final­ly bit the bul­let and asked you and now you have this super nice piece of jew­el­ry. And also a sense of impend­ing doom. There’s lit­er­al­ly so much to do between now and when you tie the knot. But not every­thing has to be done right away.

Here are 9 things to do with­in the first few weeks after get­ting engaged.

1. Enjoy the moment

First and fore­most, before you do a thing, sit and enjoy the moment with your now fiance. Not only did they buy a ring and work hard to plan this day for you, but it’s also a huge moment for the two of you. Cel­e­brate you before bring­ing any­one else in on it. Love them, thank them, and dream about mar­i­tal bliss with them. You won’t have this much peace in about five min­utes when you start snap­ping pic­tures and telling every­one. And even if you’ve already announced it, remem­ber to take a step back every once in a while and appre­ci­ate each oth­er.

two grooms holding hands

2. Call your parents and close friends and family.

Make sure you tell every­one you’re clos­est to before post­ing on social media. Maybe not your entire con­tacts list, but def­i­nite­ly every­one that would be dis­ap­point­ed to learn about it on social media. Fam­i­ly mem­bers and close friends deserve a phone call over a text. This is big for them too!

3. Insure your ring.

While it may not be at the fore­front of your mind, it’s a good idea to talk to your insur­ance provider about insur­ing your ring. Your home­own­er’s insur­ance will only cov­er so much, and often doesn’t include high-val­ue items like that 5k ring. You def­i­nite­ly want to be pro­tect­ed in the event some­thing detri­men­tal hap­pens.

4. Draft a guest list.

This won’t be your final list by any means, but it’s a good idea to go ahead and start get­ting an idea of how many peo­ple you want to invite to your wed­ding. We sug­gest break­ing it down into at least two cat­e­gories: your A‑list guests, every­one you absolute­ly must have there, and your B‑list guest, every­one else that you would like to have there. This way, when your poten­tial venues and ven­dors ask you how many peo­ple, you can say you plan on invit­ing X num­ber of peo­ple and they can fill in the rest.

5. Set your budget.

This is super impor­tant before you start too much plan­ning. Things can real­ly start to add up for a wed­ding and you don’t want to fall in love with a venue before real­iz­ing that it’s sev­er­al thou­sand dol­lars out­side of your bud­get. Hav­ing an idea of how much you want to spend from the get-go is a life­saver lat­er on. Make sure you have a thor­ough dis­cus­sion with every­one con­tribut­ing ear­ly in your plan­ning process. For more tips, see our blog post “How to Set a Real­is­tic Bud­get.”

groom in blue suit kissing bride

6. Start thinking ideas.

When, where, themes, col­ors, etc. There’s so much that goes into plan­ning a wed­ding, it’s easy to get over­whelmed. Writ­ing out some of your must-haves and get­ting inspi­ra­tion from Pin­ter­est can be a good way to nail down your wed­ding style. This way have some direc­tion before you jump head­first into plan­ning. For exam­ple, if you know you absolute­ly want an out­door cer­e­mo­ny, then that will nar­row down your date and venue.

7. Research.

Do as much research as you pos­si­bly can. Hav­ing a clear idea of what you want and how much it is going to cost helps with your bud­get and the stick­er shock lat­er on. Plus, it will give you an idea of what to expect from the ven­dors in your area, so you can look at sev­er­al dif­fer­ent ven­dors before set­tling on one.

8. Pick a Date

Or at least a sea­son to aim for. Your venue will be one of the very first things you book, so as soon as you can set­tle on a date, you should be look­ing around at your venues and adjust the date if need be. There are sev­er­al fac­tors that go into choos­ing a wed­ding date and if you want our take, we have a blog post on that, too: “Things to Con­sid­er When Pick­ing Your Wed­ding Date.”

9. Think about help.

Plan­ning a wed­ding is hard. Plain and sim­ple. So, it’s usu­al­ly a good idea to have some help, whether it’s close friends and fam­i­ly, a wed­ding plan­ner or both. It’s a lot to jug­gle by your­selves and you’ll def­i­nite­ly need some peo­ple in your cor­ner when things start get­ting crazy. A word of cau­tion, though: try to choose friends and fam­i­ly mem­bers who will help, rather than hin­der you. They need to be sup­port­ive of your deci­sions 100 percent—or at least very good at gen­tly telling you your ideas are ter­ri­ble. Here’s more on “Draft­ing Your Dream Team.”

bride and groom toasting

No mat­ter what you do first or how long your engage­ment is going to be—you got this! We are root­ing for you! We know how tough this time can be on your men­tal health and your rela­tion­ships with loved ones, so try not to stress too much. Give your­self plen­ty of time to get stuff done and take breaks to enjoy this time with your new fiancé. You’re embark­ing on a new jour­ney with your part­ner and its impor­tant to keep that in the fore­front of your mind—even when you’re pulling your hair out over cake tast­ings.

It’s still a lit­tle ways off, but it’s nev­er too ear­ly to con­sid­er the details. With all that stress pil­ing up, do you real­ly want to wor­ry about your grooms­men?

Fea­tured image by Avis­to­ria Pho­tog­ra­phy

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