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How to Write the Perfect Thank You Note


Writing thank you notes, while not a particularly challenging task, is certainly a daunting one. The wedding is over and you just got back from your honeymoon, the last thing you want to do is sit down and crank out a hundred thank you notes. Hello, carpal tunnel. But it has to be done and this is not something you want to put off.

If you are blessed enough to have a groom with good penmanship, you can at least share the burden. If you don’t, however, then the only thing that will ease this very tedious task is having a plan of attack.

The number one rule to follow when writing thank you notes is to be as genuine and specific as possible. Four or five sentences is enough, but they have to be good.

Every thank you note should include the following:

bride and groom in blue suit posing with wedding cake and love marquee letters in lousiville

Personal Greeting

Use whatever name in your greeting that you would call that person to their face. “Dear Mr. and Mrs. Smith” isn’t necessary if you know them as Bob and Sally.

Thank You

Start by saying thank you, obviously. There’s a couple ways you can do this. You can say:

  • Thank you for the specific item
  • Thank you for your kind gift
  • Thank you for sharing our special day.

Or any variation thereof. When thanking them for their gift, be as specific as possible using brands, colors, etc. (The KitchenAid mixer, the monogrammed towels, the white and gold serving dish).

Using the Gift

Explain how you plan on using the gift. “I’m so excited to use the KitchenAid mixer to make grandma’s chocolate chip cookies.” Or for monetary gifts, something along the lines of “Your generosity will help us put a downpayment on our dream home.” Avoid saying words like money, cash, or check, though. Stick to something vague, like gift or generosity.

Personal Touch

This is an optional sentence, but your thank you note will really feel special if you mention something specific about them. The kind words they said to you on your wedding day, the dance you shared, an inside joke, etc.

vintage wedding reception decor

The Future

Say that you can’t wait to see them again. If possible, be specific. “We look forward to seeing you again this Christmas.”

Thank You Again

For your last sentence, thank them again. For being there, for their gift. Thank them for everything.


Sincerely is a fine salutation, but with family and close friends, “love” or “with love” or something else is more fitting.

This structure is great for your run of the mill thank you notes, but keep in mind that you should also send thank you notes to people who played a bigger part in your big day. Your bridesmaids, close family members, etc. You’ll want to thank these people for not only any gifts they might have given you, but for also keeping you sane. The same organization works, just be sure to add in a little extra appreciation.

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